Know Which Room You’re In
A Field Guide for Boards and Staff
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Last month I wrote about role clarity within a team — identifying who carries which pack on the portage. This month I’m zooming out one level: not who’s doing the work, but whose work it is to begin with. Metaphors help clarify the subtle, invisible dynamics that leaders can feel but rarely name. I usually reach for the backcountry, but lately a restaurant has been resonating with my audiences and clients.
Any great meal or dining experience requires a delicate balance between the kitchen and dining room. The kitchen belongs to the staff. It’s where the organization’s mission gets made and the work gets done. The dining room is shared, communal space — it's where the meal meets the people it's for. Board members don't cook, but they set the table, work the room, and make sure the restaurant is the kind of place people return to. They steward the experience, the relationships, and the long-term health of the house.
Both rooms are essential, and everyone in the restaurant cares about the mission. But when roles and expectations aren’t defined, people can wander. And that’s when the meal falls apart.
Here’s how to make sure that everyone knows which room they’re in.
The Problem
While the staff is hired for their specific expertise and experience, boards are typically volunteers. Staff may not fully understand the nuances of the board’s mandate, while trustees may need more training and direction on their duties.
Board members typically have a strong instinct to help, which is great. But too often that “helping” looks like hovering, second-guessing, or micromanaging the staff cooks in the kitchen. Or maybe the board is completely hands off and uninformed about what happens beyond the dining room walls.
Part of the staff’s role is to “manage up,” and make sure that the board has all of the information it needs to do its job. But the folks leading operations often don’t understand exactly what governance looks like.
Governance is the board's job: setting direction, stewarding mission and finances, hiring and evaluating the chief executive. Staff who haven't seen it done well treat the board as an audience to perform for or a rubber stamp to push past — cutting off the input the board exists to give. Add the "manage up" challenge of framing information for board-level decisions, not operational detail.
Finally, there’s an inherent power imbalance, because the management team runs the show, but the board is legally responsible. Board members want to protect the organization, keeping risk to a minimum, and staff want to get the job done. You can see why the kitchen door gets proppedopen in ways nobody intended.
Ultimately, the goal is for the staff and board to work in tandem — in a way that’s mutually beneficial and keeps everyone clear about which room they’re in.
A Helpful Tool: Responsibility Charting
Tough questions arose after a recent talk I gave to Leadership Philadelphia. One board member of an arts organization worried that the leadership’s artistic programming choices weren’t yielding sales results. But to alter the programming, the board member would have to go into the kitchen. I suggested the staff create a dashboard with the critical artistic criteria for repertoire selection, revenue coverage by show, casting priorities, and production availability. This would help everyone understand how decisions are made and identify shared priorities.
An executive director I worked with was resentful that their board was not more strategic. But they centered every board meeting around operational reports and never carved out time for governance conversations about mission, risk, and succession. The board had grown passive, approving things without really governing. The executive director opened the door and led them into the kitchen and then wondered why they weren’t helping in the dining room.
There are many types of approaches to tackle these challenges, but I typically use the RACI method. RACI lists key decisions or deliverables and assigns people in one of four categories:
Responsible (ensures the right process and workflow are in place)
Accountable (one person with the ability to approve)
Consulted (input sought before the decision)
Informed (kept up-to-date after)
The discipline of the exercise is that only one person or entity is accountable for any item and one is responsible for the work completion — which forces the kind of specificity that good intentions rarely produce on their own. Suddenly, "we share responsibility for fundraising" becomes "the executive director has approval for the plan, the development director is responsible for execution, the board chair is consulted on major donor strategy, and the full board is informed quarterly."
The lines almost always blur in the same places: fundraising, CEO evaluation, crisis communications, and major programmatic pivots. RACI gets them straight on the table.
In Practice: One Move to Consider this Month
At the top of your next board meeting ask: "Which questions on tonight’s agenda belong in the dining room, and which belong in the kitchen?" Five minutes. Watch what surfaces.
Monthly Inspirations: Performances & Events Feeding My Thinking
The Most Spectacularly Lamentable Trial of Miz Martha Washington
Opening night of James Ijames’s incredible play featuring the Hot House ensemble.
Here with Co-Artistic Director, Lindsay Smiling.
Tristan und Isolde
Life-affirming and spectacular production and performance with dear friends. Bravi tutti.
With John Pscolar and Alan Sandman at the Metropolitan Opera.
A Weekend With My Moms
In honor of Mother’s Day moments with my mother-in-law and mother for their birthdays in April in Canada.
With Gert Dubbeldam in Burlington, ON, and Zita Devan in Lindsay, ON. I cooked both meals — kitchen and dining room.
My New Dining Table
My new live-edge dining room table was created by Wyatt Walkem at his studio in Ontario, Canada. And now it’s up to me to gather the right people around it to give it life.
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